A Martian couple landed on the earth. The emerged from their spacecraft and went up to a farmhouse. They knocked on the door. When the farmer and his wife answered, they announced that they were from Mars and wanted to come in to chat. The farm couple extended their hospitality and they all seemed to hit it off well. After a while, the farmer said "Do you two swing?"
The martian replied, "yes", and so they swapped mates and adjourned for appropriate activity.
After the martian man had climbed on, he said to the earth woman, "Is my dick long enough?"
She replied, "Well, now that you mention it, I would like it a little longer."
He said "no problem" and proceded to twist his left ear and, like magic, his dick got longer. "How's that now?"
"One notch more" said the woman.
Her request was promptly complied with via another twist of the left ear. His next question was "Would you like it a little thicker?"
She replied "yes" and he twisted his right ear once. The woman said "That's perfect!" and they proceeded to bang away.
The next morning the earth couple were comparing experiences and the husband said "how was it for you?" The wife replied, "Super! How about you?"
The husband responded, "It was pretty good, but she damn near twisted my ears off!"